You want a website? Yeah you do! Better question, who doesn't?!?!?! Do you have a vision? Great, I will take your idea and make it real life legit. Unlike every other professional webdesigner in the entire world, I will not hesitate to hold my professional ideals back. I do whatever you think you want. Move it one pixel over? Done. Unicorns? Done. Flash® intro? Done. Lens flare coming off chromed out comic sans? Supa Done! I'm telling you, whatever you want I will do! No lip. Your vision will come to life beyond your wildest expectations and you can only be happy with the final product because it's exactly what you want!!!
Let's face it, we both don't have time to haggle. You want rainbows and you want them now so why are you wasting time?
I'm yours for a week! At the end of the week your shit is real! Price includes one full day on Skype with me while I share my screen and you tell me what to do. Terms of payment: At the end of the week at noon on Friday I hand you your webdesigned website with my right hand and you hand me a briefcase of $100k with your right hand and we exchange.
Take a look at the dreams I made come true! I am not proud of any of these in the slightest but that doesn't matter! This is your dream not mine and I am here to make it happen.
So, I know you don't need any help, I know this, but you need to know about my latest tricks that can't been seen in my Work section above. Check out these special effects I can do that
could WILL make your idea even more awesome. Note: I have to outsource these effects so it will add another 90 days to the timeline but it's pretty much worth it.
"I was through with webdesigners because of so many bad experiences. They never wanted to listen to my ideas and they always compromised my vision. Then I found I'll Webdesign Your Shitty Idea™ and haven't looked back."
- Awesome Customer #1 (Nashville, TN)
"My brother in-law just didn't get it. I was trying to explain to him what chrome looked like and to just add it to my logo. It was like trying to pull teeth. Luckily I found I'll Webdesign Your Shitty Idea™ and now my whole site is chromed out. It's like I'll Webdesign Your Shitty Idea™ was reading my mind."
- Awesome Customer #532501 (London)
As you can see, not only am I worldwide famous I am also absolutely no barrier to your creative vision. I take your idea into the realm of awesome land which is where you want to be. That's why you pay me. I make shit happen.
Is this a trick question? Ha, gotcha Tricky McTrickerson. You can but I won't respond!
See Work section above
Wrong, remember, I don't respond to questions like that! If you like it I farking LUV it!!! Period.
Yes, I will make that shit sing on the interwebs